A Difficult Good-bye

I only made it at home for two days before I flew back to Bountiful. The two days I was at home were very difficult, all I could think about was that my dad was dying and I wasn't there. Todd's cousin, Shaun, works for Delta and booked me a flight on Wednesday the 22nd to go back and be with the family until the end. I was very surprised to see how much my dad had declined in two days. The next four days were very emotional. The last two days, my dad seemed to be in a coma and didn't respond to us anymore. Jennifer and Lara also flew in to be with the family. My mom, Jennifer, Lara and I slept sideways across the king bed each night so that we could be with my dad as much as possible. During the day, all of the siblings that lived locally gathered frequently. We were sad that Stephen was out of the country and couldn't be with us during my dad's last days. He was with us in spirit though. We spent most of our time sitting on the bed and visiting quietly, holding my dad's hands, singing some of his favorite songs and remembering the good times. My dad was never alone, someone was always with him. He was surrounded by love all of the time.

I have watched a few of my elderly friends go through the death process, but, I don't think anything can prepare someone to watch the final suffering and death of a parent. On Sunday morning, September 26, 2010 at 6:43 a.m., my dad took his last breath. It's so hard to believe that with one final breath, a whole life time can be over. I understand that death is a part of life and part of the plan...but it is one thing to know this and quite another to watch it first hand and then accept it. My dad passed peacefully with his sweetheart holding his hands, and with loved ones gathered around his bed. I was able to witness tender mercies of the Lord and know that He is mindful of ALL of his children, wherever we are and whatever circumstances we might be in. We are so sad to have lost the head of our family but grateful that he is out of pain. There is a quote I heard that comes to mind: "Now I know why the Lord took his day off on Sunday. That must be the day he personally greets his favorites."

I learned a lot of things from my dad these past five and a half months, here are a few: I learned that we don't get to choose the challenges that we have in life, but we can choose how we handle them. I learned to endure to the very end takes a huge amount of courage and faith. I learned it is possible to go through our trials with dignity, humility, patience and without complaining. I am so grateful for his life, his teachings, his example and his love. Godspeed Dad, until we meet again.