I SPY...A HIDEOUS BUY...

Saturday, I had to go show some houses in the northeast part of town. I found myself in the middle of the "hood" and couldn't wait to get out. This one particular house we went into, was so perfectly hideous, that I had to go back to the car and get my phone and snap a few pics. I knew if I ever attempted to describe this house, even with my keen sense of description, I would fail. The pictures cannot begin to do this house justice, but I had to give it a shot. My clients have a four year old boy. A few seconds after we had walked into the house, he exclaimed, "I don't ever want to come in this house again!" Here are a few of the photos. Remember, if you would like to buy this hideous house...or any other house...I am here to help. Feel free to click on the photos..go ahead...take a closer look.

The front door was accented with a beautiful plum color, it was deep and rich, truly beautiful.

The stylish silver, orange and white stripes above the sliding glass door. This was the extent of the stripes, they were not centered over the door. Either, they were going for the "cluster of four stripes" look, or they just got dizzy and quit.

This one got me all choked up. Someone had carefully placed and secured a delicate run of lace around the kitchen cabinets, it stretched across the tops of all the cabinets, which you can get a better sense of when you see the entire kitchen photo. Notice the beautiful shade of "peach"ish orange the walls were painted, which matched the ceiling.

This photo shows the contrast between the orange walls and the metallic silver "robot" color the back splash was painted. Don't get me wrong, I love the color silver...I think I had a pair of moon boots the exact same color. It just startled me because I would never have thought to paint it on a backsplash. Here's a little tip: don't waste time removing outlet covers, the roller just glides right over them.

Here is the view of the entire kitchen, see what did I tell you about that decorative lace?? So adorable! Why can't I think of things like that?? By the way, you will have to pick up a stove, if you want to prepare a meal, your first night in your new home. You might want to get an orange one, to match the hood.

Ahhh, the runway...this was the cat walk that led from the front door to the kitchen/family room area. Please, one at a time, single file. I'm not sure what it was made from, some unknown substance.

Here we get a view of the mirrored wall in the master suite...no matter where you are in the master...you know exactly where you are...thanks to the mirrors.

This is another bedroom with a mirror...don't ask what the chain hanging from the ceiling was for...I guess that little secret went with the former home owners.

Another view of the "chain" room...hey, I like the window seat.

The checker board bathroom...it just needs a little TLC. Now how do you get black paint off the front of a tub again? I guess if you wait long enough...it will just peel off.

Yeah this carpet was orange, but looks pink in the photo...wait...maybe it was black. All I know is it was disgusting...after walking through this house, I am considering throwing away my shoes.

This is a pink, black and white "SUNBURST" pattern that was painted on the walls as you walked up the stairs. The lines were pretty straight...I think they must have used tape.

This is the grand staircase. The same substance used on the "cat walk" was used to accent the stairs. Again, here are more mirrors... so handy, in case you need to crawl under the stairs and pick a "crusty" out of your eye before you run out the door.

Well thanks for taking the tour of the hideous house...You can purchase this house for $104,900. That is a steal at only $53 a square foot. It is a 4 bedroom 1975 square foot nightmare! This house was built in 1983...I was just a 13 year old girl in River Heights, Utah...I never imagined that I would cross paths with this house someday. I usually take notes on my MLS sheets, so that if a client has trouble remembering something about a house, I can try to help them out. After touring this house, I was speechless. All I managed to write down was..."a sick, sick house."